ramblings of a lonely me

everytime i leave brandy and whiskey out of their cages to play while i stay in the room to either pack clothes or use the internet, i tend to be a little scared of what they'd do to each other. i'll hear scruffling and little yelps, and then when brandy rushes into the room half possessed or even when she struts in nice and calmly, i always wonder if she's killed whiskey.

baby whiskey dropped her first tooth (that we managed to find) yesterday...
brandy knows that the toilet is for shitting and peeing almost 95% of the time!!

my babies are growing up~!! (and i sound... omg... scary) hokay. enough of all that motherly talk.

i had a pretty interesting conversation with a friend yesterday. even though things happened a long long time ago, it's always been stuck somewhere within, always been hoping for a time when i can let it out, actually verbally (not per say...but typing) saying i'm sorry and finally move on from there. it actually does feel like a confession and it might not seem to be such big a deal to others, it ... feels like a huge load off my shoulders. i feel like i've broken a personal emotional barrier...

haaaa... okok.. it's not THAT bad. just that... i finally feel like i can really be a friend and be myself now.

the musical's almost over for peter and i must say... it feels way better than the first time i watched it. super duper proud of him and the fact that i love musicals makes it kinda surreal to actually see that someone on stage actually also sleeps beside me. it... feels... weird in a nice way i guess.

and once he's done with the musical, we can finally concentrate on moving into the new place, and i can finally fix up my pole, and he can finally concentrate on doing his own music, and the dogs can finally have more space to run about and not be caged, and i can finally get my own furniture, and invite people over for parties and... so.. YAY!!!!!

anyway, methinks i need to make more friends here. the company i have are peter, brandy, whiskey, nicky, sometimes dave, sometimes lydia, my colleagues and some vb friends that i can hardly meet now coz my weekends are fucked up. it's kinda pathetic and i might rebel soon. i really need a life, i really dun wanna be stuck living like a mother coz i have the rest of my life to do that.

i feel like having a smoke and a drink. i think it's pms. arghhhhhhhh......maybe being alone and having pms is not a good combi for me. knowing myself, i tend to fuck up alot during this time.

okok... i better go shower and get out of the house before i do something stupid.