remind me again...

what was the main reason of coming here??

sigh.. it's my last week here in taipei and i can't quite figure out if what i've done this entire time is enough.

my most important task was to get myelf a freaking job and so far, i've only gone for one interview (which led to me attending a coupla meetings and event with them), sent out my resumes to two other places and zilch. i've got a coupla suggestions to try out at a friend's travel agency, i could go to more hotels or more wedding companies but the main problem remains the same. most of them require me to already have a work visa or some sort of visa that enables me to stay here over a longer period of time, which is sickening coz i need the companies to apply for the visa for me.. i need job for work visa and i need work visa for job. fucking chicken and egg theory.

my only consolation to this whole job seeking shit is that thankfully, i'm blissfully happy.

i must admit. i'm having a minor freaking out moment here. i guess that's what happens when one has too much time on their hands.

timbre has been an angel. he's doing great now and his life is no longer in danger. i guess it's also time now to learn about the responsibilities of taking care of another life. it's no longer just me or us. i can't quite say, 'hey, let's go for a drink' and head to the nearest bar. i can't. anymore. i'm not complaining coz he's such a sweetie (i'm talkin abt timbre). i'm just having a little alcohol deficiency here, not enough nutrients running through my blood stream. kinda missing that freedom a little.

maybe the loneliness does get to me everytime he goes to work.

once again, timbre's such a sweetie, he's just lazing beside me while i whine my afternoon away. i can't really go out too far coz of the silly fuckingly stupid financial situation i put myself in. fuck, i can't even do my hair. ok now i'm ranting. methinks it might be pms. i wish i could bring timbre to more places but i need money to travel and dun even know the place well! i wish i could bring him to the freaking zoo or just somewhere where he can run and play freely.

i wish i could do that too, to do what i want, whenever i want. okay, maybe i am missing my freedom a little more than i thought i would.

fuck man, i need a job. i'm going crazy doing nothing when everything that has to be done has been done. i'm so occupied with just taking care and being around timbre, i'm turning into a neat freak that wants to buy my doggie shoes so that he wun dirty his feet after a bath and dirty the house with pawprints. he's got a hoodie though, haha.. only to keep him out of the chills since he's scrawny as heck and to prevent people from thinking that we starved him till his ribcage showed.

check out hip hop timbre. we intend to bling him up. haha.. shit.. poor boy!

i'm happy, blissful, dun get me wrong. just not peacefully happy. the nagging at the back of my head keeps going on and on and on and on... omg i can't wait for gracia and sam to get their asses here.

i need to be practical. i need a fucking job. NOW.