the one and the wall
I think one of the saddest thing in life is to create a defence mechanism, build up a wall, be totally careful about the one you love the most.
I just had a conversation with a colleague about how he decided to settle down. He got married when he was 24.. wife.. 23.. hmm.. had their first kid at 25.. (ok, that i might skip).. hehe.. and it was only a yr after he joined the airline. So the question most posed to him was... "why do u not wanna look ard more and blah blah.. get to know more people.. blah blah.. " I guess u get point of what I'm driving at.
What actually determines when you decide you actually wanna settle down? How do u know when he or she's the one - oh the million $$ qns.
I guess you'll know it when you cannot imagine yourself living the rest of your life without him or her... or maybe it's when you know there isn't a need to second guess. Maybe it comes to a point where you KNOW the grass will ALWAYS be greener on the other side but still, you prefer the grass on ur side.. coz it prolly makes you feel more delirious.. Ultimately, it's when it makes you do the silliest and craziest things and you still boldly *takes a deep breath* say... I love you.
Back to the very first point, it's sad because even when you know and feel all of what I just said above, something inside you holds you back, and it's not the affections of someone else or anything you dun like about the person. It's just... pain, or the fear of it and hence up goes the huge wall of defense. It will never end coz this wall will forever stand and.. forever consider everyone guilty until proven innocent. And the saddest thing is that this wall will probably only keep the one you love the most out... and in turn create another wall on his or her side.
And the two of you shall be on opposite sides of the wall, wondering where each other are.. where in fact, he or she's been standing right in front of you... just too bad, the wall isn't transparent.
I just had a conversation with a colleague about how he decided to settle down. He got married when he was 24.. wife.. 23.. hmm.. had their first kid at 25.. (ok, that i might skip).. hehe.. and it was only a yr after he joined the airline. So the question most posed to him was... "why do u not wanna look ard more and blah blah.. get to know more people.. blah blah.. " I guess u get point of what I'm driving at.
What actually determines when you decide you actually wanna settle down? How do u know when he or she's the one - oh the million $$ qns.
I guess you'll know it when you cannot imagine yourself living the rest of your life without him or her... or maybe it's when you know there isn't a need to second guess. Maybe it comes to a point where you KNOW the grass will ALWAYS be greener on the other side but still, you prefer the grass on ur side.. coz it prolly makes you feel more delirious.. Ultimately, it's when it makes you do the silliest and craziest things and you still boldly *takes a deep breath* say... I love you.
Back to the very first point, it's sad because even when you know and feel all of what I just said above, something inside you holds you back, and it's not the affections of someone else or anything you dun like about the person. It's just... pain, or the fear of it and hence up goes the huge wall of defense. It will never end coz this wall will forever stand and.. forever consider everyone guilty until proven innocent. And the saddest thing is that this wall will probably only keep the one you love the most out... and in turn create another wall on his or her side.
And the two of you shall be on opposite sides of the wall, wondering where each other are.. where in fact, he or she's been standing right in front of you... just too bad, the wall isn't transparent.
posted by ah_bu @ 10:20 PM
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