happy national day...?

i didn't really remember it's national day until i was making my silly billy manicure appt for today and realised my mum was not working as well. and i was like.. how come so free?? oh.. national day holiday, remember?? oh yah.. bleah.. whatever.

been feeling kinda under the weather lately. and feeling highly unattractive. maybe my happy endorphines are not...erm... being activated. HAHA. but that's not the point. exercising should give me sufficient endorphines too, no? ah whatever... i look like a man with my manly arms. haha.. shiiiiiitttt!~

finally managed to give away my silly bangkok flight so i have a longer stretch of horrrriday. and this time, i'm staying put in asia and heading to taipei and tioman. super last min decision and a highly stressful decision making process it was, but it's finally settled and I'M GOING. everything seems so rushed though. argh!~

aiyah... sometimes, it's really not as easy even though it's been a long while coz there's just so much more underneath it all. letting go, getting used to, and really feeling okay. these are pretty fine lines and grey areas, aren't they?

ah well... methinks i'm just feeling like that coz of my flu. argh.. hate to be sick since i dun lose weight in the process like most people do so there's really no point in falling sick, is there??

ahhh.. maybe it's pms... but how can?? aiyah.. i'm so whiny today. fuck man. can't wait to get over and done with tonight's flight and get my long deserved break! *phew* staying sober isn't all that great coz now u really have to confront ur fears head on. ha...