Goodbye 2005! Hallo 2006!~ finally!

Christmas has swiftly come and gone, and now, the countdown to new year's day (oh, I mean louis's bday) begins. Hee.......

Anywayz, I've been thinking and rethinking and constantly reminded that Christmas really isn't all the shopping, eating, drinking, merry making, and pressie giving. It really is more than just wishing each other "Merry Christmas!!" when the truth is that people dun even really know what the true meaning of Christmas is. And each time I wish someone merry christmas, some part of me wince inside coz honestly, maybe it's the still small voice inside (or whatever's left of it) that's asking myself "do they know why christmas is christmas?" And what the hell does 'MERRY' christmas mean anyways? "Merry"'s such a... I dunno... methinks it kinda commercialises the whole idea of why people celebrate Christmas in the first place. Oh.... and "Merry X'mas???" I can't stand it when X'mas is used. Where's the "Christ" in Christmas?~

Oh well... I'm definately no saint so who am I to say anything about anything pertaining to the meaning of Christmas. And if we're talking about the meaning being diluted, I've probably gotta be the biggest culprit of perpetuating that. Christmas... an excuse for me to throw yet another drink-till-you-get-drunk party. Gift exchanges, turkeys... my ultra avant garde christmas tree made up of newspaper and aluminium foil (i WILL post a pic! super proud of myself!!). I suppose I'm prolly a Christian's worst nightmare, making christmas a day and nite of vices all rolled into one. An excuse to make merry... *pui*

Anyways, that's me pondering over the last few days what the hell christmas means to me besides drinking and all dat commercialised shit. It's prolly pms that's making me so cranky. Why do we have to have cramps?~! Dammit!!!

On a lighter note, the christmas party I had was pretty okay. More of louis's frens came instead. Haha... but they were a nice bunch so it was okay. Big thanks to louis and johan for the yummilicious food, as usual, and to everyone who came, thanks for gracing me with your pressence. It meant alot. Unfortunately I was a flu victim and couldn't really be the host of the year... (took a nap at 1am while my guests were still eating turkey... felt bad okay??) ah well...

Next big bash will be at louis's shophouse where we celebrate his bday and the countdown to the new year. Afterwhich, I have 2 weddings to attend consecutively. Methinks starting the year with all these happy occasions is a good thing. 2005 kinda didn't start off very well so maybe that's why it's jinxed. Goodbye blardy 2005! Hallo 2006!

And for resolutions, since I wun be ard till the 31st and once it hits 31st.. I highly doubt I'll have much computer time, here goes...

2006 resolutions includes me...

... learning to perfect my grandmama's kickass steamed egg (think chawamushi) mixed with century and salted eggs. This is for you, mama... I still miss you and Kongkong even though I never said it.

... losing 5kg by march. I'm putting on so much weight, it's not funny... and I'm NOT being a typical gal thinking I'm fat when I'm not. I really am putting on weight!! Machines dun lie.

... cutting down on alcohol. Yikes!! Can I take it back?? Now that it's in writing, I have responsibility to keep to it... ahhh!!!!!!!!!!! But no.. seriously, okay... Let's put it this way... alternate days, I'm allowed to drink.

... going home more often. I need to show some lurve at home... haha... then mummy and daddy will be more receptive to the fact that I wanna extend my lease at Normanton!! teeheehee...

... reading more books. I think that's the only way I can have 'me' time and 'reading helps the soul'.. whatever dat means! ha! No lah.. i just feel like i need a new hobby, can?!

... fooling around less. Methinks this is it. 2005 was tooooo... er... promiscious for me to handle.

... spending quality time with friends. These days it's always drinking and drinking and clubbing and more clubbing. Gonna start keeping in contact and remembering that I said I'll keep in contact and call when I say I'll call.

... learning a new skill. Belly dancing, belly good! Plus.. I've already got the belly... hahaha...

... taking my job more seriously. I mean, I'm serious enough to just do and get over and done. But methinks if I wanna excel, I'd better NOT let them have anything bad to say to begin with. Oh.. and the smile... who can resist the fucking smile... :)

... sticking to the above. Aight... every 3 months, I'm gonna review this and give a report. Haha.. I'm holding myself accountable. Er... somebody remind me when the time comes, okay??

There! 10 resolutions! Sleeping and waking up early sure has it's pros!! I'm wide awake, washed half my bucket of clothes, planned the day and year ahead and.. this time i can say... THE SHOP HASN'T OPENED!!! muahahaha...

laadidadida.. doodidoodidoooo... lalala... ;D

zombified

Aww mannn... it's blardy fucking coming to 4am and I still can't blardy fucking sleep!~~ Been tossing and turning ard in bed since my last post, it's so not funny.

I want, I need, I crave...a moment, just to fall asleep. At least if I'm out and about, it's not sooo bad coz I'm entertained. Now, there's no blardy person to talk to cept to my blog, which also means, myself.

This is sad. *argh*

sick sick hsehold of normanton

I can't sleep. Been lying in bed the whole entire day coz of a wierd flu virus which I have no idea how i caught the night before and now, when it's time to blardy sleep, I can't. Body's been aching the entire day and my head feels like exploding. Not to mention my stomach feeling a lil hungry at times and a lil queasy at times.

Thanks to louis who came by with some raisin bread, lettuce, tomatoes and ham to whip up some sandwiches. It was yummy but i couldn't finish my 2nd one. Still, at least there was something to eat lest I make myself another zimtos (cinnamon puff cereal).

Nickyboy's also got food poisoning. Poor boy's been puking and shitting the entire nite and day. (Yes, same time, I suppose). So club normanton's down by 2 crew. It was a pathetic sight that poor vivek and louis had to witness. Better stay away and quarantine this area - at least until christmas!~

Orighty, my back's aching and my bed's beckoning me, again. Got to go lie down and stare blankly into space or my ceiling until I fall asleep. One of the worst feeling is to want to sleep but can't. The other is to try ur darnest to stay awake but you just can't keep those eyelids opened.

hoooooooooo weeellllllllll........

Pre christmas blabber

It's almost christmas and the year's coming to an end. *phew* Not like it was a draggy year or anything, for me, dat is. On the contrary, I kinda think this year has gone by in almost a blink of an eye.

Mistakes, I've made more then quite a few; Lessons I've learnt aplenty; Ups, downs, lefts, rights and all dat mind boggling shit have definately added some spice to an otherwise ordinary year. But then again, I dun suppose a year can go by with everything being ordinary else dat'll be a waste. 365 days of nothing but working, eating and sleeping just doesn't sound too appealing.

Have about 10 days before we close the chapter for 2005. I wonder what 2006 has in stall for us. Hopefully people who are looking for love will find love, relationships will have a new boost of passions, happiness will come to all who deserve it and... ha, well, just enough complications for now. No more complications for 2006. If 2005 was a year of changes, adaptation, confusion, loving and leaving, please let 2006 be a year of us finally finding ourselves and not screwing it up anymore. We are afterall turning *horrors of horrors* 24~~!!~

2006 resolutions, I'll have them up before this year ends. I can't remember what my resolution was for 2005. Come to think of it and looking back, I didn't quite pen down what my resolutions were suppose to be!~~ So dat was quite unsuccessful.

Aight... time to clean up the hse, and head out. Oh ya... gotta wash the dishes too... oh i LURRRVEEE doing housework... *sheesh*

It's a sport

Like a game of volleyball, pingpong, or tennis, it's the same thing all over again. The ball gets in ur court, you determin how you want it played, you execute it and the ball is in your opponent's court and you wait, you anticipate and try to make sure you get the ball back in play and not let your opponent score a point.

Once in a while, you slip, you fall, your opponent too isn't free from mistakes so the scores just keep adding up, depending on who slips more.

You practise with different teams or players each varying in strength and weaknesses so you learn. Practise with a stronger team to learn, practise with a weaker team to build confidence and come up with game plans.

Time outs are always good coz you get to rest and look at the play from another perspective. You come up with a different strategy and you go back in fully recharged, each hoping this next set will be a better set.

Sometimes you rest your muscles by taking day offs and not train at all so this gives you ample rest for the streneous drills and training sessions ahead.

Hope this 8 days will be a good time away for me. I'm getting exhausted.

On being spontaneous

Being spontaneous is something that not many people can do. Especially in a place like Singapore where everyone's usually too busy minding their own businesses, or either too wary or too self conscious to do something a lil more different. I like being spontaneous. It's like having a plan yet not having a plan. Honestly, methinks that it's actually where all the adventure begins, and life, to me, is all (ok.. not ALL) about experiencing all those adventures.. and mishaps and then laugh about it.

Isn't it almost proven that most of the times, when you plan an outing with a group of frens, it almost always gets canned a day or two before? But hey, when it's spontaneous, just a coupla of peeps making a coupla calls or two, then voila, the gang is there? And I think u have more fun coz there isn't any expectation on how the nite will turn out so everyone just hangs loose...

Wat exactly is my point here?

Well, just that we shouldn't plan too much and just go with the flow. U never know what might hit u when things come unplanned... of coz shit happens too so just take precautions.. (wat-da-hell-am-i-talking-abt???)

Had one hell of a spontaneous date yesterday. But all was good.. haha.. maybe i really am not ready to settle down. Am I? I do, dun i? Hmmmmm.... nicky disagrees... haha.. not that he's here... i can just imagine him saying it. *argh*

Golden rules of being spontaneous...

... plan an outline.. yes, just the outline
... dun expect things to go smoothly
... dun expect.
... be open to suggestions
... be unrealistic (moderately)
... be bold, strong and courageous!! (haha.. go forth and multiply!! *opps*)
... dun say no immediately
... dun take too long to say no... or yes, or whatever floats ur boat.
... go with ur gut feeling. (even though it may be wrong, hey, people make mistakes, no?)
... dun do what u dun wanna do... and do what u wanna do even if nobody does it.
... challenge ur own limitations...
... take responsibility for ur actions and be happy.

twisted illusions

Crying is damn good for the heart, soul and mind as I've discovered last nite. I think I haven't had a good cry since god knows when... NOT like when you watch a sad movie or anything but more of the emotional sorta crying? Err... knowadimean?

Anywayz, sister just sent me this link, to find out your gothic name, check it out.

http://www.necroticobsession.com/gothname.html

And... my name... which i find quite apt... is... Twisted Illusions...