in pain

you know when you are overworking your body too much and it's screaming out in pain and agony when every single person who u meet ask you how did this particular accident happen, or how did that (read: those) bruises come about, or even how the hell are u going to work in this state, and always ends up with the last words "please, take care."

ho well, methinks i ought to give those last 3 words more serious thought coz i admit i've been pretty reckless with my body, or maybe just plain reckless. and i know it pains people who love me to see me in pain.

wakeboarding instructor gave me a little warning before i rode last week, "diana, please dun attempt to do anything too violent".

dance instructor says, "oh, she's always very violent".

anywayz, i'm regretting it. i've got a milan flight tonight but looking at my back, i seriously dunno if i can make the flight. sigh... gonna pack lotsa ko-yok, my mini heat pack and pain killers.

milan better be worth the pain.. ptui!

freaking out

today's performance. i have no idea what exactly i'm gonna do. i dunno if i'm even confident of what i think i might be able to do.

freaking out big time.

breathe di breathe...

never felt so shit unconfident in my life man. arghhh....

a quote

"a great pleasure in life is doing what people say you cannot do."

walter bagehot

back to work today!

before work begins...

it's the end of my off dayssss *phew* and i'm proud to say i've done everything else but what i initially set out to achieve - which is to pack my cupboard. there's just tooo much and i really dunno where to start!~

been a good rest though and here's a little plog to sum it all up. tired of typing lah..

So here's the wedding i've been going on and on about. darling bride got me and kellin a room and a make-up artist so we can look super chio for the dinner. (not that we're not.. heh). in anycase, it was my first time doing hair and make-up and the outcome? i felt a little like xiao long nu... or u know, those olden pugilistic kinda heroine? haha... loved it coz it was something different.

oh and i bought a necklace just for the event that screamed "BUY ME!!" match made in heaven for my dress.
ahem.. we made the brothers eat chilli with wasabe, tobasco and chilli powder, bittergourd, sugar syrup and half a glass of vinegar. *evil* but hey.. the ang bao was worth every bit of brainstorming we had lah.

oh... a little spare moment we had before i scoot off to class gave mr liang an inspiration to write a shoebox poem. fos. haha!!

The gang that managed to meet up even though someway somehow dinner was booked and cancelled and basically all the plans changed. people remained the same though.

Ahhh.. the people i love...

hokie dokie! i'm super tired now. i'll leave the more detailed stuff to later.

Pop! goes my heart..

it's day 5th of my loooong looong week of self-implemented rest. let's see, last two nites were a little bleah coz i couldn't sleep. went to bed at prolly 3 am ... tossed around till 5am... continued tossing till maybe.. 7am?? before i fell asleep only to be awoken by some shit nightmare about me missing a graduation - get this - held in church, with my volleyball coach as my teacher-in-charge, and i forgot to bring my kebaya. And basically i only had half an hour to get from the graduation venue (chinatown) to home but the traffic was heavy and my phone was spoilt so i couldn't call a cab. nervous breakdown i had. then i woke up. didn't quite sleep well after that.

another thought came through my mind though. it's about faking it.

faking what? i say... everything. i mean, i hate being fake and i just dunno how to fake it. yah, pun intented. if i really dun like a person, i guess i'll make it pretty much known by not even looking at the person. i just dun see how and why i should try to attempt to bother about the person. i mean, unless i really want to try, then honestly, i'm really trying. and trust me... i've tried... still trying sometimes.

ho well... in anycase, i guess sometimes my job does require me to be a little more pr to the people i can't quite be bothered with. there is however a limit lah... like.. i try once or twice, continue pissing me off, forget it. u ain't worth it and i can't be bothered.

and well.. times when i dun quite feel like i'm in the mood to entertain (almost seldom, i suppose), i guess i can really be quite anti-social too. like... just.. go.. away... but that's pretty seldom... ahaha..

aiyah.. on a lighter note, i still dunno how to fake it. hahaha!

ps: hate it when silly kids (teens) go to movies and start laughing at the most inappropriate times. like... fuck lah.. u wanna talk, munch, chew, laugh, giggle... fuck off and rent the freaking dvd... silly cows! shouldn't they be studying anyway!?~

and here's something silly. i got pinched by a crack on the toilet seat cover. dammit.. now my arse actully has a small little red wound. so uncalled for lor!!

hokay.. watched music and lyrics today... and this just keeps going on and on and on...

'I said I wasn't gonna lose my head
But then POP! goes my heart
I wasn't gonna fall in love again
But then POP! goes my heart'

lalala!

off, mc, leave & on course till 20 march!!

so by some wierd turn of events (actually it's not that wierd), i will be stuck in singapore for the next entire week till 20th march. my mc rate is about hitting the roof but aiyah... what the hell rite? in anycase, i seriously think that this job has made me more sickly than ever. first it's the never ending gastric problem that attacks me everytime i feel a little hungry, then it's the stupid backaches that leaves me half paralysed, then it's.. i dunno... bouts of flu and all that shit (read: diarrhoea).

i'm hoping to do something constructive this week but i dunno what.. maybe pack my cupboard and send some stuff to the salvation army? anyone keen to join? i know i have tons of clothes that HAVE TO GO. or i can give them to my sister. no no.. sell them.. muahaha!

caught coupla movies last two nites. 300 and the pursuit of happyness.

300
very very good. i like. very stylized. i mean, sometimes a little exaggeration is good and in this case, it worked well for the show. methinks the men are very very manly. hou man wor!! 8 pecks, no more no less. loved the special effects and it really kept me awake for the entire show. as in, it's almost 2 hours but you really dun feel that it's already 2 hours... and i was drowsy on medication so it had to take quite abit to keep me awake. even the sex scene was damn artsy. nice adrenaline pumping show. go catch it.

pursuit of happyness
heartwarming. totally different pace from 300. if i were on medication, i'd probably have a harder time staying awake. it's nice though. makes one think about alot of stuff.. like... honestly, why issit the pursuit and not just happiness? does it really mean one can never be entirely happy that's why it will always and will only be a constant pursuit? really awww lah the show... will smith's boy is soooo cute!! so so cute...

next show to catch... music and lyrics. yes.. i'm a sucker for drew barrymore and lovey dovey romance flicks. what's more when it has music too! maybe it'll be the inspiration i need to touch those ivory keys again.

lalala...

jet lagging

Guten Morgen! It's been a while and i must say, it's nice to finally be back home.

back started acting up on me again right after the flight and i felt almost half paralysed coz i couldn't get up from my bed, couldn't sit down, and couldn't stand straight. Not being able to get outta bed without any help was the worst i guess.

am suppose to pick up my dive equipments today to go for refresher course this afternoon.
am suppose to go wakeboarding this coming sunday morning.
am suppose to go for dance practice this afternoon before the dive.

HOW NOW BROWN COW? my weekend is royally fucked. *urgh*

... and now i gotta cut this short coz my back doesn't quite allow me to sit any longer....